My name is Barack Hussein Obama, one of the sons of Barack Obama, Sr., a Luo from Nyang'oma Kogelo, Nyanza Province, Kenya, and of Ann Dunham Soetoro.
As a result of my recent election to a high government post, I have come into possession of $3,550,000,000,000 ($3.55 trillion of U.S. dollars), that I wish to transfer to various agents in the states and abroad during the years 2009 and 2010.
However, there are many in the U.S. legislative body who want to restrict or encumber these funds. I have spoken with my advisers Messrs. David Plouffe and David Axelrod, also high government officials, on how to distribute this money without hitches, and they advised me to liaise with various U.S. citizens by email who can act as partners to impress upon their representatives that the money in question is urgently needed for important projects.
It is on this basis I am seeking for assistance. Your percentage is negotiable. Please note; your age and profession doesn't really matter in this transaction. Waiting for your immediate response.
Barack Hussein Obama
(h/t: scrappleface)
1 comment:
Y'know, the angle posited by this post really isn't a bad idea. There's got to be a way we can get in on the graft.
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